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Mar. 16th, 2008 03:42 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
stitchwhichI'm feeling very cynical today. I shouldn't - yesterday was a lovely one and I spent it with people I enjoyed being with as well as had it highlighted by running into other folks who always make me smile (and regret that we don't have the chance to spend more time together).
But still...
I have thin skin. I know it. It's one of my worst faults that I am easily hurt. And my rational mind can do a bang-up job of counseling me about it... I regret that I am not as good at incorporating the mental advice as I should be. I need to remember, no - I need to absorb and know a few points I always manage to forget.
- People you meet in social groups may be friendly, smiling, even hug you when they see you - that does not make them your friend. Even if you think of them as such, they are under no onus to reciprocate. Therefore, you have no call to feel hurt or disappointed when they make plans with others you think of as 'friends' to have parties or get-togethers without you. They are not your friends. They are friendly aquantances. Know and learn the difference. (You'd think at my age I'd have that one down.)
- People have not been raised with the same set of courtesy rules as you take for granted. So the pain you may feel as a result of chance behaviors on other's part is your own burden. It is not right nor met to react in such a way as to burden them with your pain.
- Tired and exhausted people generally over-react to emotional stimuli. Do not attend meetings and gatherings if you are exhausted. You will only prove the point.
- When you are feeling down, read your LJ comments and you can easily see that not everyone thinks of you as an evil psyche-destroying monster. This may help you grow thicker skin.
- Alternately, if some folks around you persist in needing to cast you as an evil psyche-destroying monster, you could consider actually fulfilling their need and making it true by design rather than happenstance. Keep in mind that no one would enjoy the process but at least your reputation would be earned for real rather than for other purposes.
Yeah, I'm in a foul mood. I'll get over it.
But still...
I have thin skin. I know it. It's one of my worst faults that I am easily hurt. And my rational mind can do a bang-up job of counseling me about it... I regret that I am not as good at incorporating the mental advice as I should be. I need to remember, no - I need to absorb and know a few points I always manage to forget.
- People you meet in social groups may be friendly, smiling, even hug you when they see you - that does not make them your friend. Even if you think of them as such, they are under no onus to reciprocate. Therefore, you have no call to feel hurt or disappointed when they make plans with others you think of as 'friends' to have parties or get-togethers without you. They are not your friends. They are friendly aquantances. Know and learn the difference. (You'd think at my age I'd have that one down.)
- People have not been raised with the same set of courtesy rules as you take for granted. So the pain you may feel as a result of chance behaviors on other's part is your own burden. It is not right nor met to react in such a way as to burden them with your pain.
- Tired and exhausted people generally over-react to emotional stimuli. Do not attend meetings and gatherings if you are exhausted. You will only prove the point.
- When you are feeling down, read your LJ comments and you can easily see that not everyone thinks of you as an evil psyche-destroying monster. This may help you grow thicker skin.
- Alternately, if some folks around you persist in needing to cast you as an evil psyche-destroying monster, you could consider actually fulfilling their need and making it true by design rather than happenstance. Keep in mind that no one would enjoy the process but at least your reputation would be earned for real rather than for other purposes.
Yeah, I'm in a foul mood. I'll get over it.
