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"You don't fawn all over us, therefore you don't value us."
Why can't some people understand that not being a part of rabid fandom does not equate to "I believe you are of no value"?
For example, I have a dear friend who enjoys singing barbershop music with variously sized groups. I don't care for barbershop music. I usually only last three or so songs before I hit "full", but that doesn't diminish my pride in his accomplishment nor the warm feeling I get when his face glows as he talks about it or when I see the effect his joy in performing has given his self-esteem. And he's okay with me not coming to his concerts.
The same with another couple of friends who brew beverages that I don't drink... how is it that they can understand the difference between 'loving their activity because it bring them joy' and 'loving their activity because it is the only one of value'? I understand that to them it is the only one of value - it's what fires them up, makes them glow and bounce. But they don't insist that everyone else is a big meanie if it doesn't make us glow or fires us up... so how is it other folks can develop a "if you aren't with us, you're against us" mentality so strongly about their hobby that they will rant and rave in anger and throw guilt at their friends and acquaintances who are not into that thing?
I don't get it. What happened to "it's not my gig, but I'm really glad to see you having so much fun with it" being acceptable?
(Sorry, it's an email exchange with someone that is approaching the "I give up" point with me... rather than a long rant here that might tick off other friends, I just needed to vent some steam for a moment.)
Why can't some people understand that not being a part of rabid fandom does not equate to "I believe you are of no value"?
For example, I have a dear friend who enjoys singing barbershop music with variously sized groups. I don't care for barbershop music. I usually only last three or so songs before I hit "full", but that doesn't diminish my pride in his accomplishment nor the warm feeling I get when his face glows as he talks about it or when I see the effect his joy in performing has given his self-esteem. And he's okay with me not coming to his concerts.
The same with another couple of friends who brew beverages that I don't drink... how is it that they can understand the difference between 'loving their activity because it bring them joy' and 'loving their activity because it is the only one of value'? I understand that to them it is the only one of value - it's what fires them up, makes them glow and bounce. But they don't insist that everyone else is a big meanie if it doesn't make us glow or fires us up... so how is it other folks can develop a "if you aren't with us, you're against us" mentality so strongly about their hobby that they will rant and rave in anger and throw guilt at their friends and acquaintances who are not into that thing?
I don't get it. What happened to "it's not my gig, but I'm really glad to see you having so much fun with it" being acceptable?
(Sorry, it's an email exchange with someone that is approaching the "I give up" point with me... rather than a long rant here that might tick off other friends, I just needed to vent some steam for a moment.)
