Glasgow writes a letter
Jul. 6th, 2007 11:44 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
stitchwhichDear Terrorists,
It has come to our attention that you recently attempted to disrupt, injure or even end our lives by driving a flaming Jeep Cherokee into our airport. We have assessed your suicide attack and feel it is our duty to point out several flaws in your otherwise stunningly executed plan:
1) You didn't die.
2) You didn't manage to kill anyone else either.
3) Despite attempting to burn yourselves alive with petrol, one of you was taken out by a spray can and the other by a swift right hook from a passer by.
4) A regional airport was closed for less than a day as a result of your heroic efforts.
In summary, you didn't die, you didn't kill anyone else, you were both dispensed with with an ease that suggests that perhaps you're not quite ready to take on the Evil Empire of the West quite yet, and you caused less disruption to our air travel service than rain, mist, snow and industrial action on the part of baggage handlers have all caused over the last twelve months. I hearby suggest to you that rather than being hailed as heroes in whatever paradise you may believe in, you're more likely to be made laughing stocks in Hell. What a bunch of Numpties.
Lots of love,
Glasgow
PS: On that key subject of suicide, you may wish to look it up. Whilst the Koran will give you some information on the subject, your actions force us to assume you haven't (or are unable to) read and/or understand that worthy tome. We suggest you do so without delay. Alternatively you may find that a childrens' dictionary covers the definition in terms you can comprehend.
It has come to our attention that you recently attempted to disrupt, injure or even end our lives by driving a flaming Jeep Cherokee into our airport. We have assessed your suicide attack and feel it is our duty to point out several flaws in your otherwise stunningly executed plan:
1) You didn't die.
2) You didn't manage to kill anyone else either.
3) Despite attempting to burn yourselves alive with petrol, one of you was taken out by a spray can and the other by a swift right hook from a passer by.
4) A regional airport was closed for less than a day as a result of your heroic efforts.
In summary, you didn't die, you didn't kill anyone else, you were both dispensed with with an ease that suggests that perhaps you're not quite ready to take on the Evil Empire of the West quite yet, and you caused less disruption to our air travel service than rain, mist, snow and industrial action on the part of baggage handlers have all caused over the last twelve months. I hearby suggest to you that rather than being hailed as heroes in whatever paradise you may believe in, you're more likely to be made laughing stocks in Hell. What a bunch of Numpties.
Lots of love,
Glasgow
PS: On that key subject of suicide, you may wish to look it up. Whilst the Koran will give you some information on the subject, your actions force us to assume you haven't (or are unable to) read and/or understand that worthy tome. We suggest you do so without delay. Alternatively you may find that a childrens' dictionary covers the definition in terms you can comprehend.
