pain management
Apr. 14th, 2005 01:30 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
stitchwhichPain management is easier on your own, yet more difficult. On my own, I don't have to hear all the things that are self-evident that Doctors seem to think fat middle-aged housewives don't know. And ignorance is something of a comfort, in that I don't have to face tests and their results along with the inevitable blue-devils at 3am during the waiting period. However, self-perscribing pain medicine isn't something one can do in America and avoid jail (or bodily harm) so I guess I'm gonna have to let the Doctor lecture me. It can't be worse than what I hear in my head when I'm alone. I have a friend who is heavily into believing that we "call in" everything that happens to us on some sort of semi-conscious level, and I was already sick to death of hearing "I wonder what it is in their life that caused them to feel that they needed to call in this [insert tragedy here] to themselves." Thus I'm writing in this journal because I know that friend doesn't read it... I know her beliefs are a real comfort to her but they anger me in a major way and I'm afraid I'd not be polite and respectful were she to trot such a line out on me right now. I'm quite sure - QUITE sure, that I'd not choose to be in this situation on my own part. Now, my faith does believe that we earn, or select, what lessons we get out of our lives and it's very possible that learning to deal with a sense of dependency and helplessness without falling into despair may be a lesson I'm having to face. It's possible. But I don't want someone else telling me that I chose to be useless to everyone around me for some reason known only to myself as if it were preferable to being healthy and contributing.
Yeah, yeah, yeah... rant, rant, rant... it's been a hard couple of days. I know, I know - souls are like swords and need tempering. That's probably why they don't put mouths on swords - to reduce the level of protesting during the process. (And lest you're reading this and feel tempted to worry, don't. I see the doc on Monday to work out a plan to address the growing pain and numbness.)
I got more garb for the Marinus Bazaar made today, which was nice. Better was tossing three piles of papers that I had to sort through to find tax info - three whole piles of paper yielded about 6 sheets of readouts and a whole trashcan full of "don't need this anymore". My desk thanks me. And I caught Miss Sneaky (otherwise known as Humility-the-Manx) playing soccer with one of the crossbows from one of my Lego castles I had set up on my desk - so a few of those got put away today too. I told Zack and Melissa that I'd take pictures of them and post them in our family Yahoo album but Miss Must-play has put paid to that plan. Oh, and I learned that my computer's keyboard vacumn is great for cleaning dust off of Lego castles. Nice!
I stayed up with my son long enough to get him hooked on the new "Kojak" series. I love being able to do that - hook him on something new. First it was "Seven Nations" at our local pub, then Strongbad, then Charles de Lint, Heinlein, and now Mercedes Lackey (everyone needs fluff reading). He doesn't know it, but I have evil plans for more books in his future...
Yeah, yeah, yeah... rant, rant, rant... it's been a hard couple of days. I know, I know - souls are like swords and need tempering. That's probably why they don't put mouths on swords - to reduce the level of protesting during the process. (And lest you're reading this and feel tempted to worry, don't. I see the doc on Monday to work out a plan to address the growing pain and numbness.)
I got more garb for the Marinus Bazaar made today, which was nice. Better was tossing three piles of papers that I had to sort through to find tax info - three whole piles of paper yielded about 6 sheets of readouts and a whole trashcan full of "don't need this anymore". My desk thanks me. And I caught Miss Sneaky (otherwise known as Humility-the-Manx) playing soccer with one of the crossbows from one of my Lego castles I had set up on my desk - so a few of those got put away today too. I told Zack and Melissa that I'd take pictures of them and post them in our family Yahoo album but Miss Must-play has put paid to that plan. Oh, and I learned that my computer's keyboard vacumn is great for cleaning dust off of Lego castles. Nice!
I stayed up with my son long enough to get him hooked on the new "Kojak" series. I love being able to do that - hook him on something new. First it was "Seven Nations" at our local pub, then Strongbad, then Charles de Lint, Heinlein, and now Mercedes Lackey (everyone needs fluff reading). He doesn't know it, but I have evil plans for more books in his future...
