B the ex-protégée
Apr. 19th, 2023 03:13 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
stitchwhichOh... and this happened.
When we hosted guests to play cards, as we do each Sunday evening (pretty much), the woman who'd once been my protégée (remember me mentioning her?) joined us. We had made plans to try out the new ham & potato soup for dinner. When it was time to eat, she said she'd been wanting to use the new feast gear she'd bought for herself and since she wasn't going to be attending any events soon so she'd brought it with her to use here. She pulled out a plate and a bowl. When I handed her our silverware and a napkin for her setting, she closely examined the spoon and then took a cloth out of her travel bag and wiped it down with the cloth before placing it by her dining ware. I admit, I was so taken aback that I said, "I'm sorry that my dishes are not clean enough for you" and she just shrugged her shoulders then replied that that wasn't why she'd "polished" the new flatware and turned to start talking to someone else in the room.
After our guests had gone my normally easy-going man asked what I thought about that. I told him I'd felt insulted - and he said he'd felt the same way. I'm not really sure what to do about it, if anything. Not about this particular episode per se, but about the frequent small slights she's begun displaying towards me and mine. They are so small that while they form a pattern, it'd be easy for her to blow off anything I'd say about it as me being "too touchy" or "wanting to put her in the wrong".
When we hosted guests to play cards, as we do each Sunday evening (pretty much), the woman who'd once been my protégée (remember me mentioning her?) joined us. We had made plans to try out the new ham & potato soup for dinner. When it was time to eat, she said she'd been wanting to use the new feast gear she'd bought for herself and since she wasn't going to be attending any events soon so she'd brought it with her to use here. She pulled out a plate and a bowl. When I handed her our silverware and a napkin for her setting, she closely examined the spoon and then took a cloth out of her travel bag and wiped it down with the cloth before placing it by her dining ware. I admit, I was so taken aback that I said, "I'm sorry that my dishes are not clean enough for you" and she just shrugged her shoulders then replied that that wasn't why she'd "polished" the new flatware and turned to start talking to someone else in the room.
After our guests had gone my normally easy-going man asked what I thought about that. I told him I'd felt insulted - and he said he'd felt the same way. I'm not really sure what to do about it, if anything. Not about this particular episode per se, but about the frequent small slights she's begun displaying towards me and mine. They are so small that while they form a pattern, it'd be easy for her to blow off anything I'd say about it as me being "too touchy" or "wanting to put her in the wrong".
(no subject)
Date: 2023-04-19 12:54 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2023-04-19 01:00 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2023-04-19 09:54 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2023-04-24 12:09 am (UTC)Sounds like your generous invitation did not meet her needs. As Miss Manners would say, if someone rejects or ignores your gifts (this usually comes up in the context of not saying thank-you), then the polite thing to do is to not trouble the recipient with further ones.